Pregnancy

Last night I found out that one of my best friends and his girlfriend are having a baby. I know plenty of people that have kids, but this is the first one of my friends that is local and I consider one of my best friends. It through me off at first, but the more I think about it, the more happy I am for them. I guess because of some of things I have been through and some the place I live, I am not around happy couples that are ready to have kids.

Hearing this news about them, made me not only very happy for them, but also very happy for me. It showed me, that just because I have been through some tough times, and other people have been through tough times, that if you find the right person, true love and kids are a def. possibility.

My Party

Another year, another Christmas party. As we get older, this party seems to get bigger and better. The theme for the party every year is to bring a toy(that I give to charity) and a bottle of liquor/wine for the party, and I get the keg and cook all the food. I am not sure if it is because we are older and more mature, have more money, like to party more, etc.., but either way every aspect of the party is better.
The most important thing is the toy aspect. When I first started doing the party, the majority of the toys were from the $1 store, or cvs and were all very small and little. The thought was still there, and the charity still loved them, but over time, the presents have become bigger and more expensive and are very, very nice. I don't know the exact reason why it is happening like that, but I think it is great. I am very grateful for everyone that brings a toy to my house, and I know the kids that are receiving the toys are also very, very grateful.
As far as the party itself goes, it seems to get bigger, louder, drunker, every year. I think part of it is, people are partying like that less and less, so they look at this as one night to let it all go. The majority of the party contacted me the next day and told me what a great time they had, and also how bad they felt.
When I cleaned up the next day, I found at least 20 bottles of liqour, 25 bottles of wine, 5 empty 30 packs, and the empty keg. That is a ton of booze for a holiday party. I hope everyone had a great time, and I can't wait for next year.

Our Daily Bread

Every year after my Christmas party, I have a ton of toys to give to charity. This year, I went to Our daily bread, and had about $1500 worth of brand new toys( thanks to everyone from my party that brought toys).
Once I got there, I talked to the manager inside, then drove around back and had 4-5 people help me unload my car. After emptying my trunk, backseat, and front seat, these guys all went back to their job, and not one person said anything like thank you, have a nice holiday, etc...
It's not like I wanted a hug and a trophy for dropping the toys off, but you would think at least one person would have said thank you. It makes me very dissapointed at the whole staff there, and makes me not want to donate to that company ever again.

typical email

This is just a small example of a random email chain from my friends. I use this example because this is a great example of most email chains when a sports topic is talked about. Jeff starts out with some comment which is a mix of 90% stuff he heard on tv, and 10% his own opinion. Chris then puts him in his place with something that is all opinion but normally right. Tj makes little comments, but always tries to turn it to something about himself, Brandon chimes in with little, stupid comments that no one listens to, Mikey comes in with random one liners somewhat relevant to the convo, and the cycle repeats itself....
Jeff:
I know there is still 2 weeks left but what does the BCS do about Ball St.,boise st., and Utah. I can see Utah being able to hang with some of the#5-10 teams but no where beyond that. We've all see that Boise can play andBall St. just is kinda screwed, yeah they are undefeated but I'm pretty sureevery team in the top 25 would beat them. If the BCS wants to stay to theirword, "if you're not in a major conference just go undefeated and you'll endup in the BCS," would they let them in as at-larges to play against whoevercomes from the Big East and ACC? They really should just have no setconference affiliation to any BCS game (except the rose bowl). Grantedevery week is basically a playoff game but if I see crappy bowl match ups,especially BCS games, (i.e. Georgia vs. Hawaii) I'll be extremelydisappointed. Teams I think that will be screwed over by this...the big 3in the big 12, 2 of them are getting left out. USC, the 3 other undefeatedteams, and I hate to say it Penn St. I know there is still a week left andChampionship weekend so there is still a lot that can happen. With all thatbeing said I still like my prediction from August that Florida will be theNational Champion.
And I know the game was moved to 815 on the 7th but I still might come up onthe 6th to watch that fight. I have a good feeling the fight will possiblygo the distance ending up with a little Philippine guy beating across-dressing Mexican....and yes CR what you saw on HIMYM the other nightis exactly how it works.

Chris:
I haven't been on email in a while so Im late to this email but I think it's important for fansto remember that the BCS is only set up to have the #1 and #2 teams play in a game at the end of the year. As far as any other BCS games, the member bowls have their pick of the pool of teams after the automatic qualifiers have been assigned. This year there will be 7 automatic qualifiers which will leave 3 bowls to select at-large opponents. It is, and should be, the member bowls right to select the teams that best suit that bowl. This year it looks like it will be the SEC runner-up, Ohio St. and Texas. Those are 3 great programs with tremendous followings that generate tv numbers. No one is getting screwed. Texas Tech will get go to the Cotton Bowl which is great for that program to play 3 straight New Years Bowls. Boise St. will either play a game in Boise where they're unbeatable or in San Diego which is the nicest place in America. Ball St. will play in Detroit which sucks, but that is b/c there conference hasn't negotiated a better bowl tie-in. I think sometimes people don't get what a great reward it is for teams and fans to participate in bowl games even if they aren't the Orange Bowl or the Rose Bowl. All these games are first class exhibitions and great for the entire university community.And yes I am an unabashed apologist for bowl games, but honestly no one is getting screwed.

Mead:
I'm with Obama...playoffs are the only way to go...

Jeff:
Agreed, TJ, I was telling my dad the other day when they were playing that it’s pretty much cheating, wearing all blue w/ a blue field. If these Championships go the way I think they will it’ll end up something like this, then again I’m probably wrong so you can say “face, mine, in it” Sunday before the ravens lose to my boys…Rose: USC vs. Penn St (I think that’s already set?)Orange: BC vs. Cinncy (worst automatic qualifying teams should play each other) Sugar: Alabama vs. Texas (unless Alabama gets slaughtered then I can see Utah or Boise St in there) Fiesta: Ohio St. vs. Texas Tech (although I’d like to see Utah vs. Boise St.)National Championship: Florida vs. Oklahoma…After those games I’m pretty sure like 90% of them are set with conference vs. conference by standings. Which means VT will likely go to the peach bowl again. Poor ATL, they get them to end the year this season and first game of the year next year, both vs. SEC teams which means both big losses for the Hokies. The other thing I don’t understand about the jump Oklahoma did is that they lost to texas by 10 on a neutral field, enough said. I don’t care that Oklahoma is putting up 60/game now. Even though I personally thing Oklahoma is playing better than Texas right now they still don’t deserve the right to leap frog a team that beat them in the manner that Texas did.

Tj:
Boise State unbeatable at home...more like, invisible.

Chris:
Your Fiesta bowl is wrong. Utah and Texas have automatically qualified for the BCS along w/ the 6 conference champions. The only at-large picks will be Ohio St. and the SEC runner-up.Texas Tech has pretty much been eliminated by virtue of the Big XII champion and Texas receiving automatic berths. Also no bowl game, especially not the Sugar Bowl, would ever select Boise over Alabama no matter what the score of Saturday's game is. There may be more Alabama fans than there are Boisans? Boiseans? Boiseons? Boisites?OU jumping UT in the standings shows one of the 2 major flaws in the current system. When a team loses continues to be way more important than who the team loses to (or beats), where the team loses and how the team lost. The other major flaw is that the system still doesn't explicitly disqualify non-conference champions from competing for the national championship.

Tj:
I cant believe that over almost hit last night.
What happened in the last 4 mins of the game when I was walking home?

Jeff:
Slayton ran for like a 40 yrd TD right up the middle (kinda looked exactly what he used to do at WVU) then I turned it off, no idea how jax scored)

Brandon:
of course it didn't hit..I bet on it...

jeff:
Like I said, no idea how Jax scored but I can see you yelling at your TV hoping they would of gone for 2…more importantly Mario Williams is a beast, I can’t wait until Dan Snyder buys him and then he underperforms for us.

Tj:
Maybe a good #1 draft pick after all...
Young is crazyBush dates a crazy

Mike:
Houston was the play.

Only Me

There are many things that happen to a person, and they think, this could only happen to me. With me, it seems that not only are these things happening a lot, but there is always someone there with me to verify the story.



Seagull- When I was in San Diego, I visited Sea World. The bottom line of the story is I was leaning over into the seal tank, got attacked by a sea gull, which in turn slammed my head into the railing. Within 2 seconds, I had busted open my bottom lip with blood everywhere, and the seagull had cut open my cheek. I was cussing and yelling, then I realized there were little kids there, and all I could do was laugh. My girlfriend who was with me at the time was half scared, half laughing at me. From that point on, I am petrified of birds attacking me.

Cat in the House- About 2 months ago, our neighbor lost her cat. A week later, she came up to me and said that she saw and heard her cat in our guest bedroom(the fact that she was peeking in that room is creepy, but that is a different story). Anyway, she came over two days later and searched our house, and found her cat living in the house. The first thing that jumps out is that I have a beagle that barks at everything, and somehow this cat lived in the house for a week without my dog knowing. The other thing was I was off work all week, and I too did not see the cat living there. I am not sure how it got in or how it lived there for a week, but there is no way that could happen to anyone else.

My dad flooding the basement- This story is only great if you know me and my father and how we act around each other. I had just bought my own house, and he was over helping me with some stuff around the house. My basement was finished and had a nice leather couch set and big screen tv and all that in it. The outside hose had a little leak in it, so he was outside putting a new hose on. I was upstairs pulling up some carpet and I heard this screaming coming from downstairs, yelling at me to come down there. I get to the top of the basement stairs, and I see my dad standing there underneath a part of my ceiling with water pouring down on him. Within 20 seconds, most of my ceiling collapsed in on him, and 2 of the main water pipes busted and my basement was turning into a water park. This all came from him trying to do work to all the pipes to fix this drip outside. I ended up having to get a whole new basement, and from that point on, I still think my dad is sad and upset about the whole thing. Me and him both know, that no other person would have been able to flood a whole basement just by putting a new hose on out front.

Airbag exploding- I was driving home from college with one of my buddies in the passenger seat. It was the middle of the day on 81 north(major highway), but there was no traffic around. Out of nowhere, my airbag explodes on my face, and I slam on the brakes, and swerve all the way over and nudge the guardrail. Me and Matt are so confused and amazed at what just happened, we don't even the time to flip out. The rest of my car was fine, so after realizing what happened, we got back in and drove back to Bmore with my busted airbag hanging out of the wheel. I tried to sue Honda, and get money from them, and nothing ever happened with them.



Cops coming to Kenilworth at 1am for the flood- It was a Thursday night during the ncaa tourney and we had been out watching the games, and we got home and went to bed at around midnight. About an hour later, I hear a loud banging on the front door, and I get up and look out my window, and see 2 cops outside with their flash lites shining on the house. I get a sick feeling in my stomach, due to everything bad that goes on at that house. I go downstairs to open the door, fully expecting for them to come in, search the house and arrest me and Tommy. Instead I open the door, and the cops yell at me that we have to evacuate the house right away, because of a massive flood happening on my street. I clear my eyes, and I see that the whole block is under a foot of water and people are running down the street. Our house was right in the middle of the flood, and all the water was running down our driveway and down the side of our house. I go and wake Tommy up, and we end up never leaving the house, but just standing at the door and watching this. A pipe had busted at the top of the street, it collapsed the road, and 2 cars fell in the hole. This went on until about 4am. Tommy's car was in the driveway, so all the water was rushing under his car the whole night( he had a big truck high off the ground). My car, on the other hand, was parked on the street and was being crushed with water all night.
The next morning(at around 630 am) everyone is out on the street looking at the damage. Before we went outside, I started getting calls, bc our house and my car were on the news. News crews were only allowed to go to a certain point down the road, and the cut-off was our house.
My car had about 1.5 feet of standing water in it, and it was covered in by rocks and stones from the flood tearing up the sidewalk( imagine a car being surrounded and buried in by snow). There is no way that whole thing could have happened to anyone else except me.


There are some other things (my engagement and wedding and how that ended, my arrest, etc...) but those are for another time.

Brad Carey

I have written some opinions and thoughts on here before that have been very mean and very negative towards certain people. I am not sure why I always frown on negative people and dwell on bad influences and fake friends, when there are people like Brad that I could be writing about.

I could go on and on about the pros of him, but the bottom line is, he is one of only 3 people that I am friends with, that I consider a nice, true, honest person. He will 100 out of 100 times do the right thing, never cut a corner, never bend a rule, etc... I can't say that about most people I know, even my best friends. He is someone that if every person modeled their life after his, the world would be a better place.

New York

I went to New York last weekend and stayed with Hall, and then went to the Ravens/Giants game on Sunday. Normally, a weekend in New York is no big deal, and I have a pretty good idea of what I am getting myself into. This weekend was 100% different then any weekend I have ever had up there, and it showed me a lot about myself. It showed me that I don't need all the things that I am used to, and I can have a great time with my friends and with myself, not being crazy.



I wanted to get out of Bmore for a weekend, and even though I normally party pretty hard when I am up in NYC, I knew it was going to be good for me to get away. I had no idea it would be like this.



I arrived Friday night, and by the time I got to his apt, it was about 1130pm. In Ny, that doesn't matter, so we hung out at his apt for a little bit and then walked down the street to a local bar. This was already different then the other trips, bc we were not in the heart of the city, and we were not in a big group getting wasted. We went to this bar and stayed there until about 330, no shots, no blacking out, just a couple of drinks talking and catching up. We got late night food, and then went back to his place. The next day we woke up, and started our day. My normal Saturday consists of waking up and watching game day. I then eat and drink all day starting at 12, and watch every single football game on tv. By 4, I am normally buzzed or already drunk, and getting ready to meet a group of guys to drink more and watch more football. I then party all night, and wake up sunday hung over, and do the whole thing again.



This Saturday was 100% opposite. We woke up, and his fiance made us breakfast. We hung out for a little bit and watched some dvd's(he doesn't have cable). We then left his apt and walked around Brooklyn and the Brook. Bridge and all that. We were outside and walking around just chilling for most of the day form about 12-3. We then got back to his apt(I hadn't drank or watched any football) and we showered and changed and went and grabbed a late lunch. At the bar, we ate some lunch, but didn't even drink. We chilled in his apt(I took a nap) then at night, we went to his cousin's house for a nice, sit-down dinner party. It was about 11 of us, and there was some wine and liquor drank, but nothing crazy, and nothing in excess. It was mature grown-ups sitting around having a good time. No tv blaring, no flip cup, no gambling, etc.. After the dinner party, we went home, and didn't go out any more that night.

That was the exact weekend that I needed.

Enabler

As I reflect back on my teenage years, and how that has affected me now, I realize that a lot of the things I do, I probably wouldn't have done in such excess if it was not allowed to such a degree. We all have those people's parents who growing up let them get away with more things then others, but no one had the type of parents like our one friend. His parents were not only very laid back, but they way they encouraged us to party, drink, gamble, hook up, etc.... lead to some crazy times. Looking back on it, I can see why none of our parents wanted us over there and around that type of lifestyle.



These parents were probably the most loving set of parents towards their kids, that I have ever been around. The problem was, they let them get away with so much, that it rubbed off on us, and for that reason, we, as a group, would never leave there.

As we got older, the behavior stayed the same. Now, it was ok for us to all get hammered, have parties, bring girls over, and do all that in their house, only now we could all drive home after getting hammered all night. Again, at the time, we thought this was the best thing ever, but the more I think about it, I will never, ever want my kid to be around an environment like that.



Starting freshman year in high school, we all knew this house as the place we could go any day of the week and do whatever we wanted in the basement. We knew that no matter what, we could get away with anything, and nothing mattered. An example would be a Monday night when we would go to get all you can eat wings. We would go there after, and if we had a GF we wanted to hook up with, but we couldn't bc our parents didn't want them in the house for some reason, people would take that girl to this house, while the kids that live there were out eating, and they would just drink a beer and hook up in the basement. This doesn't sound like a big deal, but looking back, we had parents letting kids that are not their own, come over where their own kids are not home and drink and hook up in the basement. That is just one example, but over time, this started happening over and over, day after day, week after week, etc...



Then the parties started happening, and things at this house really took off. We all knew as his friends, that when Friday came, we would pretty much all be crashing at this house all weekend. We also knew that where ever the high school party was that weekend, whenever it got busted, the whole world would show up at this one house where we were. When it came out that his mom was a lawyer and she kept helping us, that is really where things got bad.



We had this women who was already encouraging 14-18 year old kids to party, drink, get high, have sex, etc. in her basement, was also going to court with us and getting us out of any trouble we were in. Speeding tickets, possession of drugs, dui's, dwi's, drunk in public, it didn't matter. She would to go court, and we would get it thrown out. Years of that, gives you this complex that you can do whatever you want, whenever you want, because no matter what, you are above the law. It is because of this, that I do not judge her own kids for the decisions that they make in life, because they have lead their whole life like this, and I would act the exact same way if my parents were like that.



Over the years, these parents became so ok, with what we were doing, they started encouraging their sons to have parties, have everyone over and get as wasted as possible, gamble all night, and do whatever, as long as you didn't drive home. I understand the concept behind their thinking, but over all, the way they enabled us to do whatever we wanted, was not good for any of us in the long run.



I am not blaming my actions today on what happened in the past, I am merely saying, that it didn't help.

Love Songs

People think of love songs and they think slow and cheesy songs with a good message. Some of the best love songs I have ever heard are all hip hop and/or rap songs, and it bothers me that they don't get the credit they deserve.
I think it is impossible to find 4 better love songs then the ones listed below.
I cant wait- Akon
The Light- Common
You're all I need- Method Man and Mary J. Blige
i just called to say I love you- Stevie wonder

I know there are other good love songs, but songs like these do not get the credit that they deserve strictly because of who sings them and/or the genre of music they are.

new love already??

This is from an email my ex wrote me 1.5 weeks after we broke up, but were still talking....

I have made some decisions and have decided that we cannot hook up or talk anymore. The hooking up is too tough for me as I do attach physical things to my emotions. Talking to you is also not good for me because it will never allow me to move on. You want to be single and I get that, but I am at a different point in my life where I do not want to be single. I am not being fair to myself by still talking to you and being there for you in the way that I did when I was your girlfriend.


I have nothing wrong with what she said above, but reading the line about her not wanting to be single tells me a couple things. It tells me that it didn't matter who was she in a relationship with, as long as she was with someone. It tells me that, all the love and feelings she said she had for me, was very exaggerated and that she has the ability to throw it all away. It shows me that for as crushed and hurt as she was, she has already gone out with other guys, and is ready to date other people. I am taking a lot of this from other things she has said and written, not just that paragraph, but that paragraph does sum up a lot of it.

I know I am the one who broke up with her, but for her to run off so quickly and date someone else and want to fall in love right away shocks and hurts me.


She wrote this back to me, after I wrote pretty much the above, guess I was wrong. Like usual, she is the smarter, more normal one, and I was over-reacting and being stupid. I hope one day I am ready to settle down again with someone, and hopefully she will still be there....

I am not moving on right now, but I have no idea whether you will ever be ready to be with me so I feel like by still talking to you all the time I will never move on...I am still madly in love with you but you assume that just because I say "i dont want to be single" that that means that I am going to run and meet someone else....all that I meant by that was that we want different things...you know that I want to be with you, but how do i know you will ever want to fully be with me? you have broken up with me twice now because you dont want to be with me fully.

Lyrics

There are many song lyrics that I listen to and think, did they write that song for me??

Streets of Philadelphia-Bruce Springsteeen....I was bruised and batteredAnd I couldn't tell what I feltI was unrecognizable to myselfSaw my reflection in a windowI didn't know my own face

Superman- Goldfinger....So here I am doing everything I can holding on to what I am pretending I'm a superman I'm trying to keep the ground on my feet it seems the world's falling down around me the nights are all long I'm singing this song to try and make the answers more than maybe and I'm so confused about what to do sometimes I want to throw it all away so here I am looking older all the time growing older all the time feeling younger in my mind

History of a boring town- Less than Jake...A boring life in a boring townwith the same old crowd. (woah-oh-oh)When I used to say, that I'd never saythat I'm rotting here today. (woah-oh-oh)With that same old crowdthats always been around.And I always thought I'd bethe first to go.That same old crowd,that drags me down.Another day in a boring town.That same old crowd,that brings me down.A boring life in a boring town.

Wasting Time- Dave Matthews...Then later on the sun began to fadeThen the clouds rolled over headAnd it began to rainOh, we were dancing mouths openSplashing tongue tasteFor a moment this good time would never endYou and meYou and meJust wasting timeI was kissing you,You were kissing me loveFrom good day into the moonlightNow a night so fineMakes us wanna stay, stay, stay, stay, stay for awhile.

Poker

This is what I kept track with last night while I was playing, I am going to start keeping notes on my cell phone for all the games I play.
10/23/08- Bought in for 90 went down to 40 re bought for 30..won a bunch of hands since..chased a boat down and lost.just flopped a et of 9's guy called me all the way with 2 pair took 55 from hom..just bluffed 25 into a 20 pot to steal with nothing and took it down..starting to fold more pre flop since people can pick up I'm an aggresive player..called 10 dollar raise with 10j spades flopped a flush draw..hit the flush on the turn..guy went all in with aces up..took 42 from him.6 dollar raise I'm bb 5 callers I make it 20 to steal with j10..checked flop bc I missed..guy went all in. For another 38...4 people called..these guys are CHASERS..I would have won that pot....last 6 hands pissed away 40 pucks on crappy pre flop calls.I have to stop calling those so losely...guy just pushed all in for 58 bucks with a10..got called by someone with kq!!!....just took down a 18 and a 25 dollar small pot with being aggresive..have to start taking down little pots more often...just chased down a straight for a 80 dollar pot...just limped in with ak under the gun waiting for a raise everyone called and limped I ended up missing and having to fold.I have to be more aggrersive with premium hands...my big hand of the night I called over 110 in the pot with over pair and straight draw..got out bet on the river by someone who chased mw down for a higher paid and I could have out bet him..now I'm back to even...on tilt now just gave back 65 in 2 hands..I'm down 40 now...just folded 6 hands in a row..trying to get back on focus...holy flop I just limped in with 24..flop was a35 with 2 diamds aces up and flush draw called me all the way tripled up my 85 that I had!!!!..its now midnight faught my wasy back to even.we agreed to end game at1230 I need to be disciplined...played complete opposite game got crazy went up to 285 then back to 190 within 2 hands..walking out now 55 bucks up but have to be 31 for all my food and beer..good game I'm sleept

Marriage

Most people I hang out with, have this negative feeling towards marriage, and think that the majority of marriages wont work out the way they should I know this is mainly based on the fact that Tj and I have both been divorced already, and we look around and see other marriages falling apart and ending in divorce( Katy, Mandy, Reagan, etc..), but they refuse to look outside there little group and look at everyone else we know. Jen, Laura, Nicole, Sean, Paul, Adam, etc...are all happily married, some with kids, and are loving their lives to the fullest. The point is that marriage can work as long as both people are truly in love and truly understand the commitment that it takes.
I know most people think I am anti-marriage because of what happened to me, but that could not be farthest from the truth. True, at this exact moment in my life, I do not want to get married, but I am all for marriage again, and I think that marriage is a great thing, and if two people can find each other, that they should get married. Currently 3 of my best friends are either engaged( Brandon, hall) or recently married(mike-last week). everyone around them brings up how there is no way all 3 will work out, and tons of negative things, and I think that is the rudest, weirdest thing I have ever heard. As friends, we should be there for them, and we should want them to succeed in their marriage and in their future. It makes me very upset when people judge a relationship just from what they see on the outside, not knowing what really goes on on a day-to-day basis in those people's lives.

Questions of the day

- up to this morning, we are all hearing these commercials with him being the host of the BET awards this friday, yet the internet has all these rumors about T-pain hosting it instead, becasue kat backed out, what is going with that?
- what affect if any do you think celebrties( puff, etc) will have on the vote, since they only wear obama shirts and every interview they do, they mention voting for obams? Do you think Palins snl skits will hurt, help, or not affect her and mccain?
- if chuck norris and jack bauer got in a fight, could there be a winner?

Matt and Erin

It is tough to describe these two in detail, but watching them at my house all day, showed me exactly what I want in a relationship. I am not ready, and I do not want that now, but when I am ready, I want to find the type of relationship that they have. The way they are around each other and around their friends, they way they look at each other, everything about them is what couples should be. I hope they didn't think I was weird when I was staring at them, but watching them made me happy, and made me see that couples can be happy together, and relationships can work perfectly if both people are on the same page.

What I want

When I broke up with her, I wasn't sure if I had made the right decision or not, because I was not sure exactly what I wanted. After this last weekend, I realized what I am looking for not only in my own life, but what I would want from someone I was dating(what Matt and Erin have). This has nothing to do with her, she was and still is the best thing to ever happen to my life, but the timing was just off from what we both wanted and what we were looking for. Most people assume, I just want to be able and date and hook up with whoever I want to, and that is why I don't want to be in a relationship. That is not the case at all. For me, right now in my life, it is about doing what makes me happy, and having space and freedom to live my life the way I want to live it, and not be responsible for someone else. I thought I was ready and I wanted the serious 24/7 relationship, but over time I have realized that I was not. It sucks, because the girl I was with was ready for that, and any guy would be lucky to have her, but again, the timing was just off. I will never stop loving and/or caring for her, and it sucks for the next girl I date, whenever that is, because she will be compared to her, but I don't see how anyone I ever meet will compare to her. I guess part of me hopes that about her, and that all the guys she dates after me will not live up to me, and maybe when I am ready for what she wants, she will still be ready for me. Prior experiences( 4 of the last 5 girls I dated were looking for that also, and they are all either engaged or living with a new BF now) have told me that she wont, but then again, she is a very different person then anyone I have ever dated, and I feel stronger about her then any other girl I have ever dated, so only time can tell. For now, I have to accept that I broke up with her, and as hard as it is for me to not call or email her every detail about my life, I have to respect that we are not dating, and I have to let her get on with her own life, without me in it.

Anyway, this weekend gave me an idea of what I am looking for. When I left work on Friday, I didn't really have an idea of what I was doing that night. I had some different options, but I knew it was 100% up to me, and I could go where I wanted and hang out with who I want and that was all that mattered. I didn't have to have set plans, and I didn't have to know that if I did something without my girlfriend, then I had to explain where I was and what I was doing, and why I would rather do that then be with her. I ended up going going to the gym after work, then went to a bar and had dinner and some beers with my friends. This wasn't a planned activity, it just came up when I got a phone call when I left the gym. I like having the freedom to get a phone call and just be able to go and do something.. Eventually, I left there and went to a friends house and played poker all night.
Saturday morning, I woke up, and I knew that we were having a crab feast at my House all day and people would be coming over, but I knew I could just have fun and relax and do whatever I wanted. I ended up leaving my house at 8, and going out to watch the VT game, then stayed at the bar. I left around 1245 to go home, because I wanted to leave, not because someone else wanted to, and not because my gf was at home, and I knew I should have been with her and not at a bar. When I woke up on Sunday, I had no plans and no direction of where my day was doing. Again, I could do whatever I wanted, however I wanted to do it, and I didn't have to account for anyone else except myself. I know all of this sounds very selfish when I type it out, but if I don't give myself time to make myself happy and be truly happy with myself, I will never be able to be fully ready for a full relationship. Anyway, I watched the ravens game on my couch with my roommate and had some snacks. Then, I got a call from one of my buddies who really wanted to watch his team play at 4, but it wasn't on tv, so he had to go to a bar, so i decided to go down with him to get some food. I didn't drink at all the whole time I was there. I didn't go bc I wanted to go to a bar, i went because it was what I wanted to do at the time, so I just got off the couch, showered and went and met him. It all showed me that I really wasn't ready for a real, 24/7 marriage like relationship and that I need time to be alone and single before I am truly ready for that.
Who knows when that is something I will want with my life, but for now, I know that being single and having my space and freedom is what I need and want in my life.

Great Links

http://www.collegeotr.com/college_otr/the_top_10_girlfriend_upgrades_of_pro_athletes_13251



http://themax.yesnetwork.com/archives/2008/10/bad_ideas_with_ink.html



http://www.uncoached.com/2008/10/16/9-humongous-mismatches-in-soccer-wag-history/



http://cuzoogle.com/2008/10/14/looking-ahead-to-the-nba-season-using-babes-or-not/



http://deadspin.com/5063035/hey-wait-a-minute-didnt-braylon-edwards-go-to-michigan


cheerleaders will never get old..
http://www.yesbutnobutyes.com/archives/2008/10/movies_sexiest.html

think you know griffey?
http://simononsports.blogspot.com/2008/10/silhouette-trivia-left-handed-hitter.html

nba/roald rules challenge(bates, sam, and I may be the only ones that can identify)
http://theangryt.com/?p=1129

get girls to grasp the nfl
http://predominantlyorange.com/2008/10/23/nfl-and-greys-anatomy-do-mix/

http://thoughtsfromthejockstrap.blogspot.com/2008/10/comparing-nintendo-game-characters-and.html

Healthy Crap food

The new craze seems to be whole wheat pizza crust. I just don't get the point. To me, it is the same concept of the Chinese food menu having a weight watchers selection on the menu. I assume this all started when fast food places started selling fruit and salads. If you want to eat that way, you do; a person doesn't go to McDonald's to get an apple and a salad. When you go to order a pizza or eat Chinese, you know are you eating unhealthy, and you do it anyway. Getting a large pepperoni pizza with whole wheat crust is not considered a healthy meal. I understand that it may make you feel better in the short term to eat that, but be serious with yourself. This also holds true for people that go to get a salad to be healthy, and then put enough crap on the salad to make it more unhealthy then a real entree. Again, along the same lines as getting an extra value meal and getting a diet coke with it. I don't know why this bothers me so much, but sitting at work listening to people talk about there healthy pizza they had for lunch just got me thinking about this.

not what you think

Last night me and Chris ended up at Lils until midnight. It was a very random and weird story how we ended out, especially since we were relaxing and getting ready to both go to bed at around 1015. The point is, when we were out with the guys that got us to go out, one of them started talking to me and what he said made me think a lot about the perception that is out there of me, and then this morning, I realized that people are going to have a certain perception of me, and I cant waste my time worrying about it and trying to change people's mind. All I can do is keep living my life.

The one guy we were with, I have not hung out with in about 6-8 months. He failed to believe that this was the latest I had been out on a weeknight in a long time. He kept saying, I know you, I know how you party, you do this stuff all the time. My first reaction was to defend myself and explain to him, that I am never out that late on a school night, and even though I play a lot of social sports, I can have a beer or two after, but I am always home by 1030 at the latest. Instead, I just told him it wasn't like that and let it slide. 2 months ago, I would have defended myself, because I would have been so worried about what people thought of me, but now I am over it.

Then, he was getting ready to tell me about his plans for moving away, and before he said anything, he prefaced it with " well, I guess if I tell you everyone will know", then he went to tell me his story. The point is, that yes years ago I did tend to tell people stories if they asked or if it came up in a conversation, but now I am at the point, where I have my own life, and worrying about other people's lives and telling there stories isn't something I do. I have some friends like Brad and Wes, who trust me with everything, and tell me everything, and I have other so called best friends, that are still hesitant about telling me anything. How can you call yourself my best friend, and not be open and honest with me?

I am at the point now, where I don't really care about either of these things, I just think its funny, how people can still me view one way, when in actuality I am 180 degrees different, but they will never take the time or make the effort to find out.

Cooking

This is one skill I wish I had. I can cook a great meal like most people with a cookbook in front of me, and it will take me a good amount of time to make it. People like my roommate can come home and say I'm just going to throw together a pasta dish, and 25 minutes later we have a dish that would have probably taken me 45 minutes to make or longer. He sauteed zucchini and squash in the pan, while cooking the pasta and the sauce. He had peeled the shrimp and was steaming them also. He was also making salads and cutting up all types of other veggies to throw into the saute mix. He had the biscuits in the oven. This was a very simple dish for him, and took him no time and no thought at all. I want to be able to cook like that.
For him, cooking is fun and relaxing and something he really enjoys. I know how he feels, because I feel the same way about yardwork and gardening, which I know is weird, but every person has that thing that they like that is not the most normal. I want cooking to be another one of the things I have.

Losing a friend

Breaking up with her was hard enough, but as the time passes I realize what the hardest part of all of it is, losing a best friend. She was the first person I wanted to talk to when I woke up, and the last person I wanted to talk to before I went to bed. Anything that happened in in my life; good, bad, funny, something small, something at work, etc..., I wanted to immediately tell her about it. Knowing that she was always there to listen to me, and knowing that she was always there for me is the biggest thing I will miss.
I do understand that she is probably thinking the same thing, and is probably going through the same things I am. I stare at my phone, I stare at my email, I stare at my g-chat, wanting to write or call her and then have to stop my self. When I am not wanting to write her and/or talk to her, I am hoping that I will get some sort of message from her. I know we shouldn't still talk, and we still cant be there for each other, but realistically it is all I want, even though I know it isn't the right thing to do.

caption for picture

they made me a 24 oz. jack and ginger to drink at the bar during cocktail hour. Then they said we had to go get in line, bc the wedding party was getting introduced and we couldnt have a drink with us. Well, instead of wasting the drink, we put 2 straws in it, and drank it like a shot. I just figured there should be some explination of this pic when people start seeing it.

Kellers wedding

Things you wont see in any pictures and most people wont hear about...

- Hall snuck into my hotel room and ordered gay porn and put it on all the tv's, knowing that people were going up there to late night
- Andrew Vona had his rental car for less then 30 minutes before he wrecked it
- Hotel bars close at 1230, but food delivers until 230 in the lobby
- Ryan seward played drums and Mike Keller sang at his own wedding for 2 songs
- we forgot to ask every guest we sat as ushers if they were in the bride's family or not.
- we didnt realize that until the 3 rows that were designated for that, were completely empty.
- The recpetion bar went through 8 bottles of Jack Daniels
- White people over the age of 60 are very very scared/intimated by my roomate
- Mike Keller not shaving for his wedding day because he shaved the day before

Football thoughts- Week 7

- Colt McCoy will win the Heisman, followed by Daniel, Sanchez, Bradford, and crabtree
- unc has now lost there 2 best players for the year, they will go 2-4 there next 6 games
- The nfl is wide open now, so Im not putting any team in the sb yet, but I do see it shaking out something like this:
- nfc playoff teams- Giant, Car, Arizona, Chicago, Philly ..wild card battle between atl, no, gb, with NO winning the wild card
- afc playoff teams- Tenn, Sd, Pitt, Buffalo, Ind, wild card battle between denver, ne, miami, jets...NE pulls out the final spot
- The OC of the Miami dolphins will be a head coach within the next 2 years of some nfl team
- at least 2 former pro-bowlers will be traded by Tuesday's deadline( t. newman, t. gonzalzes, etc..)
- Bo Jackson would have been top 5 ever rb in history if he stayed healthy
- kickers getting negative points in fantasy is just a dumb rule
- Detroit is a very bad nfl team, they wont make the playoffs for another 5 years, no free agent or draft can fix all the problems they have
- The bengals will flirt with 0-16 this year, I see a 2-14 final record
- Ryan is the ROY right now, but a couple bad games and Forte or Smith would win it from him
- Jay Cutler wasnt that far off when he said he had a better arm then Elway
- If the Skins make the playoffs, I could see Portis getting some MVP votes
- Bart Scott wont be a Raven next year
- Clemson has the best talent in the ACC, and cant win games, Bowden will be gone very soon
- Penn st will be in the national championship game
- I think Usc ends with 2 losses, and the winner of the big 12 game will play psu, with the sec getting one of the open spots in the bcs game along with byu
- conf winners for ncaa will be- Okl, Florida, Vt, Usc, Psu, Pitt---Byu and Bama get at large bids

Fred Mcguire

Let me start by saying, I rarely try to hold grudges or hatred towards people, but obviously there are certain people that I do. The blog below the person will remain nameless, because I still have respect for him, and there is a salvageable future there. As far as Fred goes, I have no respect, I never want to speak to him again, and I don't really care who knows that, and more importantly, I don't care who knows the things he has done.

I have known Fred for most of my life. I don't want this to seem like I am talking behind his back. Everything I am writing, I have told to him numerous times, and most of his best friends know the stories also, and all they can say to me is "thats Fred, you have to deal with things like that from him"

Like I said, I have known him most of my life, and we have always been friends, sometimes closer then other times, but the whole time friends. Once I graduated and moved home, we became closer again, and over the last couple of years became very close. Then about 2 years ago, I found myself in a situation where I was living by myself in my house, and he was getting evicted from his house because his landlord was selling the house. It made sense that Fred could move in with me. We set everything up, and he moved his stuff in. The whole time we lived together, things were going well, he always paid rent and utilities on time. There were things that bothered me, but that is just something I dealt with.(he never bought any thing for the house, but used everything, ex. toothpaste, tp, paper towels, etc..)
After about 4 months of living there, he tells me he may be moving to Charlotte sometime in the future. That was all he mentions about it. Over the next 3 months, things got very weird and shady with him. He started avoiding me, and he would only come home when he knew I would be asleep, and then he would be gone to work by the time I woke up. He stopped paying rent, and would leave me notes on the counter telling me he knew he owed me money, and that he would get it to me.
I would see him out at a bar, or at a friends house, and he would act like everything was great, because he knew I wouldn't bring up roommate issues at a bar or a friends house, and then I wouldn't see him for another couple of weeks. He started getting sneaky, he would stay at his parents house or a friends house, just to avoid me.
Finally, after a whole bunch of drama and excuses and other shit, he tells me he is moving out in 2 weeks to go to Charlotte. I tell him fine, but he hasn't paid rent in 2 months, and the third month of rent is coming up due in a week. He knows that will be $2400, so he gives me $400 then, and tells me hell give me more before he moves, and then mail me up the rest. I believed him, and I know how expensive it can get moving, so I let him go. 2 weeks passes and he is still there, and I talk to him, and he says is going to be another month before he moves. The next day he starts all the shadiness again, and I never see him. We exchange notes on the counter, and then I wake up one day, and he is gone. He waited until a night when I was sleeping out, packed up his whole room and left. He didn't say by to any of his friends, didn't give me any money, he just left like he was the Baltimore Colts.

When I told all his best friends that he had just left, they were shocked and upset that he didn't say bye to them. I was upset about that, but also that he had ran his tab up to $2800 with me, and didn't leave me any money. Fast forward 3 months now. I have been emailing, calling, texting, etc.. him to talk to me about the money he owed me. He ignored everything, wouldn't talk to me, but at the same time would be talking to my friends who were also his friends. Eventually, he would write back to me, telling me he was going to mail up a check, and then he wouldn't and he would duck me again.

The bottom line is I will never see that money, and probably never see Fred again. It just bothers me, that I was such a bad judge of character to not only be friends with someone like that, but to let them into my house. This man left a state without telling any of his friends, and owing his landlord/friend close to 3K. He is now moving to Richmond, my guess is he did some bad things in Charlotte, and is ducking out of there like he did Baltimore.

Why am I holding on to this hatred??

I have a friend that used to be a best friend, who for some reason I can't let go of my hatred and loss of respect for him. Throughout his whole life he has always been a little sketchy and shady, but when it came down to it, he was always there for his friends and he would do everything and anything for them. About 3 years ago, he moved out west and that is when it all changed for me.

This friend and I were the main people in each other's lives that we could always ask for pretty large sums of money, and we would lend it to each other without thinking twice about it, because we knew we were good for it, and we also played high stakes poker together and we knew how it could get sometimes. Money was never an issue with us. When he left to move out west, he left owing me approx $1000, which he had borrowed over time the previous 2 months before that. He also left owing about 4 other people a combine $2000. To this day, I have not seen a cent of that money, and everyone thinks because of that, that is why I haven't let go of the hatred. The fact is, that has nothing to do about it, and if he were to ever move back here I would probably not even bring it up unless he did. I have never let money influence anything in my life.

My wedding was set for early July,that meant my friend would be in his new state for about 2.5 months before hand. He was a groomsman in my wedding. There was speculation from everyone that he would not come in town, but no person would be a groomsmen and then not show up, and if they did, they would give notice. Time approached closer, and I never heard from him, then I got nervous when his roommate out west was calling me getting details about the wedding and telling me how excited he was to come in town. He never said anything about my other friend. Finally, it is the day before my wedding and everyone is in town, except for my friend who was a groomsmen. He never called, he hadn't returned my 30some calls over the last 2 months, nothing... Instead, he told 2 other guys in my wedding to tell me he was sorry for not coming and that was it. He managed to call my house and leave 2 messages for me that weekend telling me he was sorry he never made it. He called the HOUSE during the rehearsal dinner and during the actual wedding; 2 times he knew 100% I would not be home. I knew he was wasting money and doing drugs and gambling out there, but I didn't think that would make him do this. since then, he has never once explained to me what happened and why he didn't come, and more importantly he has never even apologized for it.
It all would have been fine, if I knew in advance he wasn't going to come, and even after the wedding, if he would have explained himself or even apologized.

About 2 months before he left, I introduced him to a group of older men that I play poker with. i was playing a regular game once a week at this guy's house, and I slowly brought him into that scene. The guy had a multi-million dollar house, and my friend(who was a painter) convinced him to let him paint the house. The owner of the house was very skeptical because he barely knew this person who was asking for 80% of the bill upfront in cash, so he asked me about him. I vouched for him, and said he would def. do it and not be shady. 1.5 months pass and my friend has moved out west with 90% of the cash from the guy, and has left a house half painted. The owner was pissed and was asking me every day about him, and I kept saying, don't worry, He will be home for my wedding weekend and he can finish then. My friend never once called the house owner or me to explain anything. He just ran off with the money, and left me looking awful and embarrassed to a group of men that I had not only become close with, but were all close friends with my uncle. I am still waiting for an apology and/or and explination for what happened here, and for him to at least acknowledge what he did was crappy.

The final thing that still bothers me is how he handled my fiance's neighbor house. In hind sight, I hate her neighbors so I don't care about them at all, but this just goes to show more my friends character. It was sort of the same situation as above, only I didn't really know these people except that they were best friends of my fiance's parents. He agreed to paint there whole sidings and outside of their house about 4 months before he moved away. He gave them a good price and didn't ask for that much up front. He started to paint and was doing a good job, and then suddenly stopped and disappeared. He never called them, he never answered their calls, and he avoided me at all costs when I brought it up. He ended up ducking them for over 2 months, never called and moved away leaving their house half painted and they had to hire someone else.

Now, over the years anyone that has known him, knows how shady and undependable he can be. But, like I said before he was always there for his friends. This showed me how selfish he was and how he was only looking out for himself. In the 2+ years he has lived out west, numerous people have gone out to visit him. 80% of those people had tried contacting him, never heard from him, and then would get a call from him as they were in the airport getting ready to leave. They had been calling him the whole time they were out there, and he would ignore them until the final day. 15% of the people have actually been with him out there, and he has made plans to get them in places or take them around at night, then he just ignores all calls at night and never talks to them again. The other 5% people have actually seen him and hung out with him, and they just partied with him for a couple hours and then he disappeared again.

Part of me is worried for him, not so much for his immediate health, but for his life overall. I know how he has tendencies to big up big debts and then try to run from them and duck people, and I know that won't work where he is. I also know his addictive personality is more intense then anyone I have ever met, and where he is living, gambling, drugs, and drinking are prevalent 24 hours a day. As much as I want to be worried and be there for him, I am still so hurt and upset by not only the way he treated me when he left, but how over the last 2+ years he has gone out of his way to ignore all of it, and if he calls he tries to just have a bullshit convo, then says he has to go to work when I bring something up.

Friendship

In life you run across numerous people that you can consider a friend. As I have gotten older and started to really think, I have realized there is a huge line between real friends and just casual/party friends. Yes, there can be people that are your best friend and also a party friend, but for the most part they fall into certain categories, and over time you have to start deciding which group is most important to you and who you want to be spending your time with.

I am a very social person, so by nature I have a lot of casual/party friends. These are everyone, that I may see out at bars a lot. Over time we have become friends and we hang out, but we are not really close and the important things in my life have no bearing or importance to them. How is my life going, who am I dating, how's my job, etc....Things like that and other things important to me, are of no meaning to them. To those friends, the things that are important is what bar are we drinking at, which game should we bet on, can I get them any drugs, etc...To them, if I am not out at a bar or I decide I want to hang out, but I am not drinking heavy with them, there response is along the lines of me being a pussy or me being no fun. They only know me as someone they can have fun with, and they have never bothered to take the time to actually know me. In actuality, they should be saying, Jason-I see you aren't at the bars as much or you haven't been drinking as much, is everything ok with you?? The bottom line is this group of friends is great to have to hang out with, but in my overall life, it is becoming clearer and clearer that I need to distance myself from this group and become closer with the group that actually cares about me, and not about what bar I went to and if I was blacked out or not.

The other group of friends I have are the group that I consider my good and best friends. Yes, the majority of these people are also party friends and people I go out with, but that is mainly because I choose to spend my time with them. we can have a good time together at a bar, but at the same time we can have a good time just sitting and watching tv, or just grabbing food, or playing golf; mainly we can have a good time without having it have to be at a bar or huge social setting. These people care about my life and the decisions I make in my life, and they may not talk to me about all the time and ask me about it all the time( we are guys, and not everyone is as open and a dork as I am), but I know they care and I know that if I need something or someone to talk to,they will be there for me. These are the friends that I need to stay close with and even try to get closer too.

I fell over the last 2 years or so, I have let the first group of my friend control me and the majority of my decisions, and it's time for me to not only take control back of my own life, but at the same time start to shy away from that first group, and only hang out with them on my time and my terms, not because they are all out at a bar and they want me to come hang out with them, because if I didn't' come up and hang out with them, they wouldn't care at all and they probably wouldn't even notice if I was there or not. I do have a group of people in that first category that I know I could be good friends with, the question is will they ever see past the partying and the drinking to notice it.

reunion

My 10-year reunion was this past weekend, and it went pretty much how I expected it to. People catching up, exaggerating their life and what they are currently doing, getting very drunk, the end. The flip side is that I had to plan the whole thing, since our president is the worse. I know I complain about it, but at the same time, I enjoy planning and organizing things like that.

The weird thing was I was still a little nervous the week leading up to it, and very nervous that day. I was not nervous for some of the reasons you would expect people to be nervous for a thing like that( some people actually told me these were reasons they almost didn't come); i was a dork in high school and no one will talk to me, i was embarrassed about certain things so I didn't want to go, i didn't like this person 10 years ago, so I have no reason to go and hang out with them, etc...
I was nervous, because I had planned it, and I wanted to make sure it went well and that every person there had a good time. I'm sure anyone that would have planned it, would have thought that for a minute, but that feeling stuck with me. That leads to a deeper feeling that I am trying to stop, but for some reason I can not.
I feel the need to always make sure other people are happy and I will do whatever I can to make them that way. Some call it being a push-over or a pussy, but it is not exactly like that. I am trying to lead my life for myself; only doing what I want, when I want to do it, not going somewhere or doing something because someone else want me to. Yet, when something like this comes up, I fall right back into the trap of making sure everyone is happy, and not for one second thinking about myself or caring if I was very happy.
The truth is, I didn't want to plan it, and I wasn't 100% sold on going to it. But over the last year, I had gotten calls and emails asking me the details about it, and our president called me and said she wasn't going to do it at all, I just took it upon myself to plan it. I didn't do that for myself, I did it so everyone would have a 10 year reunion, and everyone would be happy.
I would like to think that 10 years after high school, I can lead my life for myself, and not based on other people, but it looks like I still have a ton of growing up to do.

Things we learned this weekend

things we learned this weekend:

- dallas is going to win the nfc
- Larry Johnson will not be a chief next year
- les miles has balls
- i have a whole new respect for yankee stadium and yankee fans after last night
- oooooooooooosa oooooooooooooosa golf entertained us all with there team play and attitude
- when purple patio is crowded, its the best place in fed hill
- no one from my grade has changed much in 10 years
- I dont like my house and I will be moved out within a year
- I need to play more poker during the week, my skills are dwindalin
- trading ronnie brown for kevin walter seemed ok at the beggining of the week
- not taking felix jones brandon jacobs also seemed like a good idea at the beggining of the week
- most of my friends have serious drinking problems, but no one is ever going to tell each other that or actually do anything about it
- the orioles wont finish above .500 for at least the next 5 years
- what is wrong with the colts
- if the betting scale from worse to best is mead to tj, then the football scale should be the state of ohio to the the state of penn.

When do you have a problem???

How do you know when you have a problem in your life?? For some they may drink to much, for other shop to much, other gamble, etc... There are plenty of things in life that people have problems and addictions with. Some people treat girls and relationships awful, others would rather get high every single day and never leave the house. The problem with all of these things that if you are so tangled up in your problem, a. how do you know you have a problem, and b. have you surrounded yourself with people like you, so their is no one to tell you that you do have a problem.

An example would be if someone drank way to much, and was on a road of self-destruction. If that person has surrounded themselves with only drinking buddies and other locals at bars and liquor stores, who is there to tell them that they have a problem and that they are on a bad bath??? This could be applied to a women who is spending every pay check she gets on new purses, shoes, shits, etc...She is then showing all of these to her friends, co-workers, and others. All she hears back from them, is how great she looks, how great everything on her looks, and then people are asking her to go shopping with her soon. This women will never see that she has an addiction to shopping and is throwing away all of her money, the same way the drunk will never realize that he has a problem, because no one around them will take the time to talk to them about it.

On the other side, how do you go about talking to someone about this without sounding like a hypocrite? If everyone you know, including yourself, drinks and gambles and does things, but their someone specific you think does it way to much, how do you talk to that person and get them to take you seriously if you are the one with them every night doing those things??

It is tough to know when you have a problem or when you are on a path of self-destruction, all I can hope for is that my friends are man enough to ever let me know if they something that I do not.

Money

I have led my whole life not caring about money. By not caring, I mean I acted the exact same if I had money or if I didnt have money. I grew up an only child being raised by 2 single parents, who both struggled to make tons of money. I got used to not having all the luxory's that some of my friends did, even though my parents did everything in their power to make sure I was happy and had everything I needed. I learned to get by and have fun without having tons of money, and on the flip side when I did have money, I found myself being careless with it and not worrying about saving it and just going on my life. I feel like over the years, it is finally starting to catch up with me.

A few years ago I had a job where I was making a ton of money. I found myself having more money then I knew what to do with. I was spending money every way I could, but I was(to my credit) finding ways to save some of that money also. Eventually I left that job, but I never really left my spending patterns that I developed at that job. Since then, I have had numerous jobs that have all paid less that then that one did, and yet I find myself not saving really any at all, but yet, I am still spending money on stupid things and blowing money in ways I don't really want to. It is almost like I have no control over my life, and I just do things and don't worry about any of the consequences. I am starting a new job next Monday and I am making a promise to myself, that I will stop by frivolous spending and start saving money like a grown-up and acting the way I should have been the last 5 or so years....

Blaming Others

In the last 2 weeks of sports we have seen very bad calls by the officials that have in some way changed the outcome of the games. There was a celebration call in the byu/wsh game that made the extra pt 15 yards longer, and then it got blocked. There was also the fumble in the den/sd game that was called an incomplete pass. Denver then went on to score and win the game, even though the correct call was to give the ball to SD and end the game. In both of these cases, the teams still had a chance to play and win the game, but they lost anyway, and instead of taking responsibility for their respective losses, they blamed the refs. SD had 3 chances to stop Denver from scoring the gw touchdown and the 2-pt conversion, instead their defense gave up 2 scores in 3 plays, and wash let byu block the extra kick.

This got me thinking on how myself along with the majority of my friends blame other people and other events for things that happen in their own life, when for the most part, a person can only control what happens to themselves. I know that I am guilty of this almost every day of my life. I let something that someone else says or does affect the way I think or what I do. I have to start living my life based on what I want to do and how I want to, not based on what other people do or how I think other people want to act.

I am going to tell myself that starting today, I am going to act the way I want and not let other people influence me or control me. We will see how it goes....

take-a-ways from this weekend

my take-a-ways from this weekend:

- bachelor parties are always a great time
- jason campell assured everone that he is the starter for the skins for the next 5 years with his play yesterday in the 4th quarter
- if you start chanting enough, people will join in( the whole center field section and then all of hustler club chanting " mikey keller, clap clap clap clap"
- from now on if someone wants to know if they are a good gambler or not, the scale will be from brandon mead to tj lauer, since they are the worst and best respectively
- brian hey and i will be 2 of the final 4 playing at the table in 2 months to go to vegas
- jeff sugrue has a severe drinking problem
- penn state is going to win the big 10
- the 4th quarter between sd and denver is the 3rd best 4th quarter of football I have ever seen
- vt wont hit an over all year
- having kurt warner and jay cutler as your fantasy qb's is a win-win situation
- joe hicks and mithc allen both had no idea who meghan fox was
- the lady at nick's fish house has 2 beer pong and 1 flip cup table set up for us for the reunion this saturday
- chase daniel has more td passes then he does incompletions
- dan keller is the most selfish person I know
- dave willey is bff with every stripper in bmore
- chris and I played a ncaa game last night that was more entertaining then any game on tv saturday
- darren sproles may not be the fastest guy in the nfl, but he is very high up there
- I tihnk the winner of tonight's game will play the winner of gb/ nyg for the nfc championship
- denver will win the sb

choices for the day

- better draft class:
marino's class in nfl, lebron's class in nba, jordan's class in nba
- best 2pac song
- better set of college roomates;
steve mariucchi and tom izzo, chris rathebe and joe gibison, brandon mead and joe hicks
- better hater of the knicks: m. jordon, l. bird, or r. miller
- loiuseu you would rather hang out with :
mia or lilly
- a worse group of people:
the cast of seinfeld vs. the cast of sunny in philadelphia
- better group of drinkers:
cast of cheers vs. the 13 of us that were on the 8/8/8 crawl
- better game: no limit omaha or knickey
- better hip-hop love song:
i cant wait- akon, the light- common, you're all i need- meth and mary j
- better guest on wild n' out- tara reid, snoop, or faboulous
- better corner- darrell green or deion sanders
- what do these have in common:
dog biscuit, pepper, diet coke
- which mead has bigger boobs: joe or brandon