30,000 americans a year commit suicide

Some people think suicide is one of the most selfish things a person can do. I on the other hand, 100% understand why people do it. I have to assume that most people that do it are deeply depressed and sad and that combines with not having people to talk to about it, not having people you can trust and the feeling that no matter what you do in your life, things will never be better.

More and more every day I understand why people do this and I just feel bad for them. I have to assume that if that many people kill them self each year, I have to think that probably 10 times as many people have the thought somewhere along the lime.

Most people do not know what it is like to be depressed every day. Most people do not know what it is like so be sad and have low self-esteem every day. Most people can not grasp that every day you wake up, even if you have things going good for you, you are still down, you still are stressed, you still think people are judging you, or saying things about you etc. The point is, when you suffer from serious depression and you get anxiety and you have low self-esteem or any sort of combo of those, life is very difficult on an everyday basis.

I think one of the main reasons people do commit suicide has to do with not being able to talk to anyone about the feelings they have. You can not go to your parents and talk to them, because they will over react. You convince yourself that what you are thinking is dumb and stupid and you aren't really that depressed and you would never do anything, so there is no reason to tell your parents. You can not go to any of your friends, even your best friends, because you feel so ashamed and embarrassed about how you feel and you realize that they wouldn't understand and when you suffer from depression and the low self-esteem you convince yourself that not only would no one care about any of your problems, but that no one else is depressed at all and no one else is sad and that everyone else's life is perfect so you get to scared/embarrassed to talk to them about it. Instead, you are stuck by yourself in this depressed bubble of life and every day is a struggle. Yes, they have all types of pills you can take that can help, but one of the main problems is that when any little thing happens, instead of just letting it happen and then move on from it, you end up dwelling on it and it eats you up inside. You end up not wanting to go out in public, you get this feeling of all you want to do is crawl up in a ball or just turn off all the lights and hide in your room from the world.

I guess the point is, I understand why people do kill themselves, and under no circumstance is it selfish at all. I can see if someone, say a father of 3, gets fired, go and gets hammered and kills himself thinking he can not go on or something like that. But, for the most part, it is people that are truly depressed. They have either never talked to anyone about it, or they just do not know how to deal with it. They truly think that not only would no one miss them at all if they killed them self, they also think that their life is just so shitty that no matter what it can not get better and nothing can make them happy. When you have those thoughts all the time, it can add up, and then they end up doing it. It is a very awful thing, but again, the average person doesn't get it, and the average person has a good, happy life and they could never understand what it is like to be depressed and get sad and to think that everything is down and that things could never get better.